Born February 10,1926, the second child of Harry and Florence Daubenschmidt
Her mother died when she was 2…
Her widowed father, sister Floss and baby brother Harry moved in with Grandmother Koerner along with her Aunt Emma and lived there until Harry married Anne McConigle.
She was a solid B/C average student at Catholic private school and devoted much of her free time to helping raise her younger siblings.
In high school, she was a member of the Personality Club, Home Ec Club, Aviation Club and the Victory Corps. The latter's purpose was to organize war efforts in the high school including collecting salvage, making surgical dressings, farm work,. "Gracie" was known for her love of jitterbugging even while in school. She graduated in 1944. Recently found correspondence highlights that Grace was very close to her sister Floss and missed her desperately when the family moved to State College and Floss had remained in NJ.
August 24 1944 she was hired by the War Department as a clerk typist first in State College earning an annual salary of $1260.00. March 21, 1946 she was transferred to Fort George Meade in Maryland. Two and half years later she requested a transfer to the Yokohama Japan base.
On November 16,1948 she boarded a ship bound for Yokohama. She writes in the only diary known , "It was quite impressive and exciting with the streamers waving from the dock and the band playing. They played Penn. Polka for me. Sailing time was 11:00 am and as the ship pulled away from the pier the band played "Now is the hour" and "Auld Lang Syne". As the tears rolled down my cheeks I began to wonder why I ever signed on that dotted line."
Within hours she began what she called " a three day siege of being sea sick" writing, "I swear I'll never go home if I have to go by water." The next day she wrote, "Too damn sick to think about living." By day four she wrote, "Have been looking like a freak because I haven't washed or put my hair up and really didn't care what it looked like."
December 19, 1948 she was introduced to Jack Blackwell in the Yokohama PX by a mutual friend.
During her time in Japan she climbed Mt. Fuji, learned to ski at Shige Heights, was a member of the "English Club" mingling with Japanese interested in improving their English language skills. She and Jack became engaged to be married and upon completion of her 3 year employment contract she returned to Fort George Meade to continue working as a clerk typist. They married January 5, 1951.
Over the years she worked as a machine operator in a ceramics plant, a tax examiner, Secretary to the director of the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History and finally ending her working life as a laundry mat owner. But most of her adult years she was a stay-at-home-mom who attended PTA meetings, drove her four kids to lessons, joined the Homemakers Club in Bowie. Not one to be idle, my mom tried her hand at a few hobbies and took lessons in such things as cake decorating, tennis, and horse back riding. In the summer of 1982 while still living in Monrovia, Md; before the big move to the PNW; Grace even took a motorcycle riding course with her son, Michael. She did really well, but on the last night of class, she fell off the motorcycle and badly sprained her ankle. Mom made Michael swear not to tell anyone how it happened. But of course he blabbed to everyone because he was so proud of his mother's adventurous spirit. It was not in our vernacular then; but I think what the kids today would say is, "MY MOM IS BAD ASS ! "
Upon relocating to Lake Stevens, WA in the fall of 1982, Grace wasted no time in becoming involved in her community. She was recognized by the General Hospital of Everett in 2 different years for having achieved over 250 hours of volunteer service. Many of those were spent in the maternity ward rocking the babies. Grace was also a member for many years of the American Legion Auxiliary. One year she was the committee chair for Evergreen Girls State. Girls State is a nationwide program sponsored by the Legion. Girls who have completed their junior year of high school get the opportunity to attend a weeklong seminar where they learn about government and citizenship. The year Grace chaired the committee saw record-breaking participation. My mom & dad both participated in building an extensive playground at the local elementary school. Mom would show up for her volunteer shifts ready to do anything the site supervisor asked of her; whether it was cutting repetitive pieces of wood on the band saw or painting. Grace was certainly not afraid to get her hands dirty ! This project actually received some national acclaim because it was built entirely with volunteer labor and donations. No public funds were used.
When my parents separated in 1997, my mom struck out on her own and purchased a place in a 55+ mobile home park. Again, she wasted no time becoming a part of her new community; frequently hosting weekly coffee hours. In her 9 years of living at La Tierra Estates, Grace became known as "The Angel of the Park". Whenever any of her neighbors was ill; Grace was there to nurse them. If someone needed groceries; Grace took care of it. If someone needed a ride and/or escort to a doctor's appointment; Grace did not hesitate to offer her chauffer services. There was one situation where the couple residing across the street both fell ill; but were sent to separate rehab facilities. My mom thoughtfully took care of things on the home front for them….bringing in the mail; making sure the rent was paid; watering plants….and still found time to visit with each of them daily, relaying messages back and forth. (apparently the old folks didn't use cell phones or FaceTime) When the wife was sufficiently recuperated, but not yet released; Grace would pick her up at her rehab facility and drive her across town to where the husband was in a nursing home. Selfless.
Once a mother and a nurturer; always a mother and a nurturer. The onset of dementia and moving into an assisted living facility definitely did not squelch that instinct. Once again, my mom embraced her new community and quickly became the "darling" of Grandview Village…..in the eyes of the staff and her fellow residents alike. She was always very protective of her table-mates and seemed to have a special sensitivity for the underdog. On two separate occasions, my mom adopted a "boyfriend" at the assisted living facility. My brother, Michael, was initially aghast ! However, his fears were allayed when he realized that all these men wanted from his mother was someone to cut up their meat at meal time; and to make sure they didn't trip climbing back onto their scooter. Occasionally they required her to wipe their chins with her napkin if it was a particularly messy meal. Michael also came to realize that all our mom wanted out of these relationships was to feel needed.
There is one fundamental characteristic of Grace that frames all her other attributes and that was her attitude of gratitude. She was a profoundly grateful person and it was not uncommon to hear her say how she had thanked God that morning for the sunshine or a hot shower. She did not take the small things of life for granted nad she appreciated all of it. Grateful people are intrinsically happy people and as Grace aged with more dementia, her gratitude only seemed to increase as did her happiness. She wrote in a journal,
May 31 2011 "How did I get so lucky to be blessed with such great children?"
And one thing she was ALWAYS grateful about was that she did not have to cook…
"Lunch time – Yippie…don't have to cook it! "
"Just got back from lunch…always enjoy it…I don't have to cook anymore! I'm so glad I don't have to cook it."
Grace truly aged gracefully with a happy and grateful heart. May we all have the good fortune to view life through the eyes of gratitude and enjoy the simplest joys of life with gusto right up to the very end .
She was preceded in death by her husband, John; her parents; and her brothers, James Smith, Harry Smith and John Smith; and her sister, Florence Barna.
She is survived by her three sons and daughter, John D. Jr. of Marysville, WA., James J. of Frederick, MD, Michael D. of Linville, WA, and Jeanne M. Hinds of Raleigh, NC.; 9 grandchildren; 9 great grandchildren; two sisters, Jean Malobicky and Ann Fry.; and several nieces and nephews.
Jack and Grace in Japan 1949-1950: https://youtu.be/9zVZPu1D7HM
Home movies from 1955 to 1966: https://youtu.be/lfe6eGl3IhQ
Her mother died when she was 2…
Her widowed father, sister Floss and baby brother Harry moved in with Grandmother Koerner along with her Aunt Emma and lived there until Harry married Anne McConigle.
She was a solid B/C average student at Catholic private school and devoted much of her free time to helping raise her younger siblings.
In high school, she was a member of the Personality Club, Home Ec Club, Aviation Club and the Victory Corps. The latter's purpose was to organize war efforts in the high school including collecting salvage, making surgical dressings, farm work,. "Gracie" was known for her love of jitterbugging even while in school. She graduated in 1944. Recently found correspondence highlights that Grace was very close to her sister Floss and missed her desperately when the family moved to State College and Floss had remained in NJ.
August 24 1944 she was hired by the War Department as a clerk typist first in State College earning an annual salary of $1260.00. March 21, 1946 she was transferred to Fort George Meade in Maryland. Two and half years later she requested a transfer to the Yokohama Japan base.
On November 16,1948 she boarded a ship bound for Yokohama. She writes in the only diary known , "It was quite impressive and exciting with the streamers waving from the dock and the band playing. They played Penn. Polka for me. Sailing time was 11:00 am and as the ship pulled away from the pier the band played "Now is the hour" and "Auld Lang Syne". As the tears rolled down my cheeks I began to wonder why I ever signed on that dotted line."
Within hours she began what she called " a three day siege of being sea sick" writing, "I swear I'll never go home if I have to go by water." The next day she wrote, "Too damn sick to think about living." By day four she wrote, "Have been looking like a freak because I haven't washed or put my hair up and really didn't care what it looked like."
December 19, 1948 she was introduced to Jack Blackwell in the Yokohama PX by a mutual friend.
During her time in Japan she climbed Mt. Fuji, learned to ski at Shige Heights, was a member of the "English Club" mingling with Japanese interested in improving their English language skills. She and Jack became engaged to be married and upon completion of her 3 year employment contract she returned to Fort George Meade to continue working as a clerk typist. They married January 5, 1951.
Over the years she worked as a machine operator in a ceramics plant, a tax examiner, Secretary to the director of the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History and finally ending her working life as a laundry mat owner. But most of her adult years she was a stay-at-home-mom who attended PTA meetings, drove her four kids to lessons, joined the Homemakers Club in Bowie. Not one to be idle, my mom tried her hand at a few hobbies and took lessons in such things as cake decorating, tennis, and horse back riding. In the summer of 1982 while still living in Monrovia, Md; before the big move to the PNW; Grace even took a motorcycle riding course with her son, Michael. She did really well, but on the last night of class, she fell off the motorcycle and badly sprained her ankle. Mom made Michael swear not to tell anyone how it happened. But of course he blabbed to everyone because he was so proud of his mother's adventurous spirit. It was not in our vernacular then; but I think what the kids today would say is, "MY MOM IS BAD ASS ! "
Upon relocating to Lake Stevens, WA in the fall of 1982, Grace wasted no time in becoming involved in her community. She was recognized by the General Hospital of Everett in 2 different years for having achieved over 250 hours of volunteer service. Many of those were spent in the maternity ward rocking the babies. Grace was also a member for many years of the American Legion Auxiliary. One year she was the committee chair for Evergreen Girls State. Girls State is a nationwide program sponsored by the Legion. Girls who have completed their junior year of high school get the opportunity to attend a weeklong seminar where they learn about government and citizenship. The year Grace chaired the committee saw record-breaking participation. My mom & dad both participated in building an extensive playground at the local elementary school. Mom would show up for her volunteer shifts ready to do anything the site supervisor asked of her; whether it was cutting repetitive pieces of wood on the band saw or painting. Grace was certainly not afraid to get her hands dirty ! This project actually received some national acclaim because it was built entirely with volunteer labor and donations. No public funds were used.
When my parents separated in 1997, my mom struck out on her own and purchased a place in a 55+ mobile home park. Again, she wasted no time becoming a part of her new community; frequently hosting weekly coffee hours. In her 9 years of living at La Tierra Estates, Grace became known as "The Angel of the Park". Whenever any of her neighbors was ill; Grace was there to nurse them. If someone needed groceries; Grace took care of it. If someone needed a ride and/or escort to a doctor's appointment; Grace did not hesitate to offer her chauffer services. There was one situation where the couple residing across the street both fell ill; but were sent to separate rehab facilities. My mom thoughtfully took care of things on the home front for them….bringing in the mail; making sure the rent was paid; watering plants….and still found time to visit with each of them daily, relaying messages back and forth. (apparently the old folks didn't use cell phones or FaceTime) When the wife was sufficiently recuperated, but not yet released; Grace would pick her up at her rehab facility and drive her across town to where the husband was in a nursing home. Selfless.
Once a mother and a nurturer; always a mother and a nurturer. The onset of dementia and moving into an assisted living facility definitely did not squelch that instinct. Once again, my mom embraced her new community and quickly became the "darling" of Grandview Village…..in the eyes of the staff and her fellow residents alike. She was always very protective of her table-mates and seemed to have a special sensitivity for the underdog. On two separate occasions, my mom adopted a "boyfriend" at the assisted living facility. My brother, Michael, was initially aghast ! However, his fears were allayed when he realized that all these men wanted from his mother was someone to cut up their meat at meal time; and to make sure they didn't trip climbing back onto their scooter. Occasionally they required her to wipe their chins with her napkin if it was a particularly messy meal. Michael also came to realize that all our mom wanted out of these relationships was to feel needed.
There is one fundamental characteristic of Grace that frames all her other attributes and that was her attitude of gratitude. She was a profoundly grateful person and it was not uncommon to hear her say how she had thanked God that morning for the sunshine or a hot shower. She did not take the small things of life for granted nad she appreciated all of it. Grateful people are intrinsically happy people and as Grace aged with more dementia, her gratitude only seemed to increase as did her happiness. She wrote in a journal,
May 31 2011 "How did I get so lucky to be blessed with such great children?"
And one thing she was ALWAYS grateful about was that she did not have to cook…
"Lunch time – Yippie…don't have to cook it! "
"Just got back from lunch…always enjoy it…I don't have to cook anymore! I'm so glad I don't have to cook it."
Grace truly aged gracefully with a happy and grateful heart. May we all have the good fortune to view life through the eyes of gratitude and enjoy the simplest joys of life with gusto right up to the very end .
She was preceded in death by her husband, John; her parents; and her brothers, James Smith, Harry Smith and John Smith; and her sister, Florence Barna.
She is survived by her three sons and daughter, John D. Jr. of Marysville, WA., James J. of Frederick, MD, Michael D. of Linville, WA, and Jeanne M. Hinds of Raleigh, NC.; 9 grandchildren; 9 great grandchildren; two sisters, Jean Malobicky and Ann Fry.; and several nieces and nephews.
Jack and Grace in Japan 1949-1950: https://youtu.be/9zVZPu1D7HM
Home movies from 1955 to 1966: https://youtu.be/lfe6eGl3IhQ
Born February 10,1926, the second child of Harry and Florence Daubenschmidt
Her mother died when she was 2…
Her widowed father, sister Floss and baby brother Harry moved in with Grandmother Koerner along with her Aunt Emma and lived there until Harry married Anne McConigle.
She was a solid B/C average student at Catholic private school and devoted much of her free time to helping raise her younger siblings.
In high school, she was a member of the Personality Club, Home Ec Club, Aviation Club and the Victory Corps. The latter's purpose was to organize war efforts in the high school including collecting salvage, making surgical dressings, farm work,. "Gracie" was known for her love of jitterbugging even while in school. She graduated in 1944. Recently found correspondence highlights that Grace was very close to her sister Floss and missed her desperately when the family moved to State College and Floss had remained in NJ.
August 24 1944 she was hired by the War Department as a clerk typist first in State College earning an annual salary of $1260.00. March 21, 1946 she was transferred to Fort George Meade in Maryland. Two and half years later she requested a transfer to the Yokohama Japan base.
On November 16,1948 she boarded a ship bound for Yokohama. She writes in the only diary known , "It was quite impressive and exciting with the streamers waving from the dock and the band playing. They played Penn. Polka for me. Sailing time was 11:00 am and as the ship pulled away from the pier the band played "Now is the hour" and "Auld Lang Syne". As the tears rolled down my cheeks I began to wonder why I ever signed on that dotted line."
Within hours she began what she called " a three day siege of being sea sick" writing, "I swear I'll never go home if I have to go by water." The next day she wrote, "Too damn sick to think about living." By day four she wrote, "Have been looking like a freak because I haven't washed or put my hair up and really didn't care what it looked like."
December 19, 1948 she was introduced to Jack Blackwell in the Yokohama PX by a mutual friend.
During her time in Japan she climbed Mt. Fuji, learned to ski at Shige Heights, was a member of the "English Club" mingling with Japanese interested in improving their English language skills. She and Jack became engaged to be married and upon completion of her 3 year employment contract she returned to Fort George Meade to continue working as a clerk typist. They married January 5, 1951.
Over the years she worked as a machine operator in a ceramics plant, a tax examiner, Secretary to the director of the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History and finally ending her working life as a laundry mat owner. But most of her adult years she was a stay-at-home-mom who attended PTA meetings, drove her four kids to lessons, joined the Homemakers Club in Bowie. Not one to be idle, my mom tried her hand at a few hobbies and took lessons in such things as cake decorating, tennis, and horse back riding. In the summer of 1982 while still living in Monrovia, Md; before the big move to the PNW; Grace even took a motorcycle riding course with her son, Michael. She did really well, but on the last night of class, she fell off the motorcycle and badly sprained her ankle. Mom made Michael swear not to tell anyone how it happened. But of course he blabbed to everyone because he was so proud of his mother's adventurous spirit. It was not in our vernacular then; but I think what the kids today would say is, "MY MOM IS BAD ASS ! "
Upon relocating to Lake Stevens, WA in the fall of 1982, Grace wasted no time in becoming involved in her community. She was recognized by the General Hospital of Everett in 2 different years for having achieved over 250 hours of volunteer service. Many of those were spent in the maternity ward rocking the babies. Grace was also a member for many years of the American Legion Auxiliary. One year she was the committee chair for Evergreen Girls State. Girls State is a nationwide program sponsored by the Legion. Girls who have completed their junior year of high school get the opportunity to attend a weeklong seminar where they learn about government and citizenship. The year Grace chaired the committee saw record-breaking participation. My mom & dad both participated in building an extensive playground at the local elementary school. Mom would show up for her volunteer shifts ready to do anything the site supervisor asked of her; whether it was cutting repetitive pieces of wood on the band saw or painting. Grace was certainly not afraid to get her hands dirty ! This project actually received some national acclaim because it was built entirely with volunteer labor and donations. No public funds were used.
When my parents separated in 1997, my mom struck out on her own and purchased a place in a 55+ mobile home park. Again, she wasted no time becoming a part of her new community; frequently hosting weekly coffee hours. In her 9 years of living at La Tierra Estates, Grace became known as "The Angel of the Park". Whenever any of her neighbors was ill; Grace was there to nurse them. If someone needed groceries; Grace took care of it. If someone needed a ride and/or escort to a doctor's appointment; Grace did not hesitate to offer her chauffer services. There was one situation where the couple residing across the street both fell ill; but were sent to separate rehab facilities. My mom thoughtfully took care of things on the home front for them….bringing in the mail; making sure the rent was paid; watering plants….and still found time to visit with each of them daily, relaying messages back and forth. (apparently the old folks didn't use cell phones or FaceTime) When the wife was sufficiently recuperated, but not yet released; Grace would pick her up at her rehab facility and drive her across town to where the husband was in a nursing home. Selfless.
Once a mother and a nurturer; always a mother and a nurturer. The onset of dementia and moving into an assisted living facility definitely did not squelch that instinct. Once again, my mom embraced her new community and quickly became the "darling" of Grandview Village…..in the eyes of the staff and her fellow residents alike. She was always very protective of her table-mates and seemed to have a special sensitivity for the underdog. On two separate occasions, my mom adopted a "boyfriend" at the assisted living facility. My brother, Michael, was initially aghast ! However, his fears were allayed when he realized that all these men wanted from his mother was someone to cut up their meat at meal time; and to make sure they didn't trip climbing back onto their scooter. Occasionally they required her to wipe their chins with her napkin if it was a particularly messy meal. Michael also came to realize that all our mom wanted out of these relationships was to feel needed.
There is one fundamental characteristic of Grace that frames all her other attributes and that was her attitude of gratitude. She was a profoundly grateful person and it was not uncommon to hear her say how she had thanked God that morning for the sunshine or a hot shower. She did not take the small things of life for granted nad she appreciated all of it. Grateful people are intrinsically happy people and as Grace aged with more dementia, her gratitude only seemed to increase as did her happiness. She wrote in a journal,
May 31 2011 "How did I get so lucky to be blessed with such great children?"
And one thing she was ALWAYS grateful about was that she did not have to cook…
"Lunch time – Yippie…don't have to cook it! "
"Just got back from lunch…always enjoy it…I don't have to cook anymore! I'm so glad I don't have to cook it."
Grace truly aged gracefully with a happy and grateful heart. May we all have the good fortune to view life through the eyes of gratitude and enjoy the simplest joys of life with gusto right up to the very end .
She was preceded in death by her husband, John; her parents; and her brothers, James Smith, Harry Smith and John Smith; and her sister, Florence Barna.
She is survived by her three sons and daughter, John D. Jr. of Marysville, WA., James J. of Frederick, MD, Michael D. of Linville, WA, and Jeanne M. Hinds of Raleigh, NC.; 9 grandchildren; 9 great grandchildren; two sisters, Jean Malobicky and Ann Fry.; and several nieces and nephews.
Jack and Grace in Japan 1949-1950: https://youtu.be/9zVZPu1D7HM
Home movies from 1955 to 1966: https://youtu.be/lfe6eGl3IhQ
Her mother died when she was 2…
Her widowed father, sister Floss and baby brother Harry moved in with Grandmother Koerner along with her Aunt Emma and lived there until Harry married Anne McConigle.
She was a solid B/C average student at Catholic private school and devoted much of her free time to helping raise her younger siblings.
In high school, she was a member of the Personality Club, Home Ec Club, Aviation Club and the Victory Corps. The latter's purpose was to organize war efforts in the high school including collecting salvage, making surgical dressings, farm work,. "Gracie" was known for her love of jitterbugging even while in school. She graduated in 1944. Recently found correspondence highlights that Grace was very close to her sister Floss and missed her desperately when the family moved to State College and Floss had remained in NJ.
August 24 1944 she was hired by the War Department as a clerk typist first in State College earning an annual salary of $1260.00. March 21, 1946 she was transferred to Fort George Meade in Maryland. Two and half years later she requested a transfer to the Yokohama Japan base.
On November 16,1948 she boarded a ship bound for Yokohama. She writes in the only diary known , "It was quite impressive and exciting with the streamers waving from the dock and the band playing. They played Penn. Polka for me. Sailing time was 11:00 am and as the ship pulled away from the pier the band played "Now is the hour" and "Auld Lang Syne". As the tears rolled down my cheeks I began to wonder why I ever signed on that dotted line."
Within hours she began what she called " a three day siege of being sea sick" writing, "I swear I'll never go home if I have to go by water." The next day she wrote, "Too damn sick to think about living." By day four she wrote, "Have been looking like a freak because I haven't washed or put my hair up and really didn't care what it looked like."
December 19, 1948 she was introduced to Jack Blackwell in the Yokohama PX by a mutual friend.
During her time in Japan she climbed Mt. Fuji, learned to ski at Shige Heights, was a member of the "English Club" mingling with Japanese interested in improving their English language skills. She and Jack became engaged to be married and upon completion of her 3 year employment contract she returned to Fort George Meade to continue working as a clerk typist. They married January 5, 1951.
Over the years she worked as a machine operator in a ceramics plant, a tax examiner, Secretary to the director of the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History and finally ending her working life as a laundry mat owner. But most of her adult years she was a stay-at-home-mom who attended PTA meetings, drove her four kids to lessons, joined the Homemakers Club in Bowie. Not one to be idle, my mom tried her hand at a few hobbies and took lessons in such things as cake decorating, tennis, and horse back riding. In the summer of 1982 while still living in Monrovia, Md; before the big move to the PNW; Grace even took a motorcycle riding course with her son, Michael. She did really well, but on the last night of class, she fell off the motorcycle and badly sprained her ankle. Mom made Michael swear not to tell anyone how it happened. But of course he blabbed to everyone because he was so proud of his mother's adventurous spirit. It was not in our vernacular then; but I think what the kids today would say is, "MY MOM IS BAD ASS ! "
Upon relocating to Lake Stevens, WA in the fall of 1982, Grace wasted no time in becoming involved in her community. She was recognized by the General Hospital of Everett in 2 different years for having achieved over 250 hours of volunteer service. Many of those were spent in the maternity ward rocking the babies. Grace was also a member for many years of the American Legion Auxiliary. One year she was the committee chair for Evergreen Girls State. Girls State is a nationwide program sponsored by the Legion. Girls who have completed their junior year of high school get the opportunity to attend a weeklong seminar where they learn about government and citizenship. The year Grace chaired the committee saw record-breaking participation. My mom & dad both participated in building an extensive playground at the local elementary school. Mom would show up for her volunteer shifts ready to do anything the site supervisor asked of her; whether it was cutting repetitive pieces of wood on the band saw or painting. Grace was certainly not afraid to get her hands dirty ! This project actually received some national acclaim because it was built entirely with volunteer labor and donations. No public funds were used.
When my parents separated in 1997, my mom struck out on her own and purchased a place in a 55+ mobile home park. Again, she wasted no time becoming a part of her new community; frequently hosting weekly coffee hours. In her 9 years of living at La Tierra Estates, Grace became known as "The Angel of the Park". Whenever any of her neighbors was ill; Grace was there to nurse them. If someone needed groceries; Grace took care of it. If someone needed a ride and/or escort to a doctor's appointment; Grace did not hesitate to offer her chauffer services. There was one situation where the couple residing across the street both fell ill; but were sent to separate rehab facilities. My mom thoughtfully took care of things on the home front for them….bringing in the mail; making sure the rent was paid; watering plants….and still found time to visit with each of them daily, relaying messages back and forth. (apparently the old folks didn't use cell phones or FaceTime) When the wife was sufficiently recuperated, but not yet released; Grace would pick her up at her rehab facility and drive her across town to where the husband was in a nursing home. Selfless.
Once a mother and a nurturer; always a mother and a nurturer. The onset of dementia and moving into an assisted living facility definitely did not squelch that instinct. Once again, my mom embraced her new community and quickly became the "darling" of Grandview Village…..in the eyes of the staff and her fellow residents alike. She was always very protective of her table-mates and seemed to have a special sensitivity for the underdog. On two separate occasions, my mom adopted a "boyfriend" at the assisted living facility. My brother, Michael, was initially aghast ! However, his fears were allayed when he realized that all these men wanted from his mother was someone to cut up their meat at meal time; and to make sure they didn't trip climbing back onto their scooter. Occasionally they required her to wipe their chins with her napkin if it was a particularly messy meal. Michael also came to realize that all our mom wanted out of these relationships was to feel needed.
There is one fundamental characteristic of Grace that frames all her other attributes and that was her attitude of gratitude. She was a profoundly grateful person and it was not uncommon to hear her say how she had thanked God that morning for the sunshine or a hot shower. She did not take the small things of life for granted nad she appreciated all of it. Grateful people are intrinsically happy people and as Grace aged with more dementia, her gratitude only seemed to increase as did her happiness. She wrote in a journal,
May 31 2011 "How did I get so lucky to be blessed with such great children?"
And one thing she was ALWAYS grateful about was that she did not have to cook…
"Lunch time – Yippie…don't have to cook it! "
"Just got back from lunch…always enjoy it…I don't have to cook anymore! I'm so glad I don't have to cook it."
Grace truly aged gracefully with a happy and grateful heart. May we all have the good fortune to view life through the eyes of gratitude and enjoy the simplest joys of life with gusto right up to the very end .
She was preceded in death by her husband, John; her parents; and her brothers, James Smith, Harry Smith and John Smith; and her sister, Florence Barna.
She is survived by her three sons and daughter, John D. Jr. of Marysville, WA., James J. of Frederick, MD, Michael D. of Linville, WA, and Jeanne M. Hinds of Raleigh, NC.; 9 grandchildren; 9 great grandchildren; two sisters, Jean Malobicky and Ann Fry.; and several nieces and nephews.
Jack and Grace in Japan 1949-1950: https://youtu.be/9zVZPu1D7HM
Home movies from 1955 to 1966: https://youtu.be/lfe6eGl3IhQ
